Where Is My Heart? Where is my energy?

For the past several months my thoughts and contemplations have been on 2 Timothy 4:5, the last part of that verse mostly, "do the work of an evangelist, make full proof of thy ministry." Sometimes as a pastor, business can take the place of the passion that is overarching and the compassion to be moved for that overarching passion. Our Savior's passion was to seek and save the lost and he was moved with compassion to fulfill that passion. Meetings and administration becomes the major part of a pastor's life, if the pastor allows it. Confessing, that has been a struggle for me and the passage keeps coming to me, "do the work of an evangelist, make full proof of thy ministry." I feel, that no one is less gifted as an evangelist than I am, but that does not excuse the call of the Lord for evangelization in my ministry and the local church where I pastor.

Just now, as I write this, I long for the Holy Ghost (or Holy Spirit if you prefer) to come among us and manifest as He chooses and to bring a freshness to our services beyond what we could even think or believe. Yet, I strongly believe "doing the work of an evangelist" must become the major focus in my life, and seeking God first must be first. "Do the work of an evangelist, make full proof of thy ministry." It was sound admonition and instruction for Pastor Timothy and it is sound for me today. . . Where is my heart? Where is my energy? Milton Gordon